It’s not 2014 anymore

Hey everybody, tonight is Garbage Day Live in San Francisco, so today’s issue is going to be just a short one. I need to obsessively troubleshoot technical problems all day that don’t actually exist or matter, only so I can be surprised with completely different ones minutes before the show starts. (Tickets here and at the door if you want to come!)

This week, President Joe Biden decided the best way to assure everyone that he’s not old was to introduce Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy as “President Putin” at a NATO summit and then show up late to his own press conference afterwards, where he called Vice President Kamala Harris, “Vice President Trump,” and just generally rambled incoherently for a while. Apparently, if you think he did a bad job, you’re racist. Biden is, at the very least, having a better week than Katy Perry, who’s new song “Woman’s World” was savaged by The Guardian, Pitchfork, and Dazed. The bright side here, though, is that there is a very real possibility that Perry flopping might be the wake up call Democrats need to realize it’s not 2014 anymore.

Elsewhere in global politics, the Scottish comedian that’s been trying to find the far-right candidate that supposedly ran in Glasgow finally made contact. Do yourself a favor and just click through and watch all the videos. They’re great. But to circle back to America’s shit show one last time, I thought this New Yorker piece on Biden and the media was pretty astute. And if all this isn’t upsetting enough for you, welcome to Mogwarts.

Oh well, here’s some fun stuff…

• Babies don’t have knee caps

• r/Frasier_Sleepers

• A modern friendship problem

• “How the Broccoli Perm Became the Definitive Zoomer Hairstyle”

• A discerning little man

• Sydney Sweeney reacting to AI

• The mamas are eating you know what that means

• A yaoi investigation

Alrighty! See you tonight or see you in your inbox next week!

P.S. here’s when guys brag about what they eat.

***Any typos in this email are purpose actually, but with more of carefree weekend vibe***